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Every time I read a transcribed voicemail, I’m less convinced about ML:

“Hey Billy, shoot. I was just calling to tell you I'm going in for some minor surgery tomorrow to short my toes. Just going to make the attendance of dead girl under so very good. I won't be able to hang on trees like a sloth anymore, but it's going to be good. Now my shows are trying to make a fist.”

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Creating a new kind of linked list that is so inefficient at look up that it will irreversibly destroy the environment

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"how hard would it be for me to write a hypothetical tool that read in racket code and turned all the identifiers into uwu speak"

"i wish it was harder"

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hyperbolic geometry
upsides: cool as hell
downsides: hard

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@wilbowma i have to take probability or diffeq later so maybe probability theory rather than stats idk

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"is this pair programming, or am I just sitting here?"
"this is pair programming."

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Me: *spends several weeks mulling over one thing before arriving at a tentative and yet proven correct solution* ah yes it's so obvious! how did I not see it before! a child could do this

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not screen reader friendly, long 

STOP MAKING WEBAPPS
- WEB PAGES WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE INTERACTIVE
- YEARS OF JAVASCRIPT yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for going more complex than POPUP MENUS
- Wanted to go higher anyway for a laugh? We had a tool for that. It was called FLASH
- “Yeah I’m gonna use MVC to create an SPA that talks to a RESTful API” – Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged

LOOK at what Webdevs have been demanding your respect for all this time, with all the servers and protocols we’ve built for them
(This is REAL code, written by REAL Webdevs):

function isEven(i) { return !isOdd(i) } // ?????
ReactDOM.render(
<div>
<TodoList/>
</div>,
destination
); // ???????
(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){i['GoogleAnalyticsObject']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){
(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),
m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)
})(window,document,'script','//www.google-analytics.com/analytics.js','ga'); // ???????????????

“Hello I would like {{ $scope.get(“numApples”) }} apples please”
They have played us for absolute fools

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@mathTrash A technique that worked for me was taking a somewhat advanced lecture you're interested in (if there are fewer people attending it, it's even better), doing well at it and maybe asking 1-2 good questions. This means the professor is very likely to remember you in a positive light. If you're super lucky, they'll just come and ask you if you want to work with them, but it will usually work if you then go to them to ask for a project or something.

There's likely other ways but this has worked for me and some of my friends in undergrad so it's quite replicable, I think.

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monads != the instance
please leave me alone

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i've gotten 4 emails about monads.online and the only instance of me talking about monads.online is me complaining about people emailing me about monads.online

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c19 rel 

i got my covid test back and it said i was an idiot and would never amount to anything

also it was negative

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a monad is a monad in the category of monads

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"The principle that 'if it holds true in all observed cases, it holds true in all cases' is referred to as 'Engineer's Induction'"

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types.pl

A Mastodon instance for programming language theorists and mathematicians. Or just anyone who wants to hang out.